I was asked this question not long ago by a newly married man. He’s clearly been reading his Bible, looking for relevant verses as he begins his life as a husband (as he should!). I thought the question and answer were worth sharing…
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.“
(Ephesians 5:25-27 NKJV)After the part where Paul states for husbands to love their wives as Christ loves the church, what is he talking about when he says that love might sanctify and cleanse her? I think he’s referring to the church, but how is that applicable to a husband/wife relationship?
My answer is this:
You’re not wrong that’s talking about Jesus and His church, as opposed to husbands and wives. Paul has a tendency to “run away” with his metaphors. The text started out with a simple: “Husbands love your wives the way Christ loves His church,” and then he elaborated on how much Jesus loved His church: “and gave Himself for her.” Paul could have stopped there, but he ran with it and added more that Jesus did for us, which isn’t really applicable to what we do for our wives, but it’s good material so I’m glad it’s in the text.
That said, if you had to make a connection to husbands and wives, it would be this: Jesus’ love made us unblemished and holy, and if we are good to our wives, they will be unblemished, too. Don’t abuse your wife. Don’t mistreat your wife. Don’t make your wife regret being married to you. Don’t make other people think “I wouldn’t want to be married to that guy!”
When people see the church, they should see a loving and loved bride. For husbands, it should be the same when people see our wives: loving AND loved.
~Matthew