We’re almost finished with a study on Sunday mornings in the Young Adults class, discussing a variety of topics that come up frequently in everyday life. It’s practical and needful and worth your time if you want to join us. Recently we studied patience, and a thought came to me in the middle of class…
There is a subtle, but specific, difference between “being patient” and “long-suffering.”
Take for example the poor flight attendant having to settle down an unruly passenger 30,000 feet in the air. After ten minutes of being shouted at, berated, and insulted, the flight attendant can only smile and say “I’m sorry, but that behavior is not allowed on this flight.” After it’s all over, the unruly person will be put on a list banning them from flying with that airline again. But, by then, the damage is already done; the flight attendant had to listen to all of the insults hurled his or her way.
We might watch the interaction from a distance and think “wow that is one patient person.” In fact, it was not patience being displayed, but long-suffering. The two ideas are similar, and even related, but they are not the same.
To be long-suffering is to put up with someone or something. It implies a hardship being suffered and the refusal of the one suffering to take the abuse without retaliating. It is, as the word implies, the characteristic of a person who can “suffer” a “long” time without snapping.
On the other hand, there is patience. This word is more about “waiting” for something. Now, I hear you; you’re probably thinking that a long-suffering person also is waiting. Yes, the long-suffering one is waiting for the person shouting at them to be quiet, but what if they don’t? Sometimes you’re just standing there, being meek and mild as a Christian ought, and no immediate good comes out of the situation. That’s a time to be longsuffering, whereas a time to be patient is when you’re working toward something good in the end.
I sometimes have to deal with people who bring me grief. I anticipate the day when all my griefs will end. I am longsuffering to the former and patient for the latter. When my child misbehaves, I am longsuffering. I have a fuse, but it is long. My children are still young, still learning, still testing boundaries and forgetting commands. I have a fuse, but it does eventually end, and when it does, punishment must be laid down.
In fact, the word “long suffering” literally means “long+breathing hard.” I’m reminded of the time when my Master watched the money changers in the Temple, extorting needy Jews who had come to Jerusalem to worship. With every sinful transaction, the Lord stood by, breathing heavily, knotting a whip from nearby cords. His fuse was slowly reaching its end and, when it did, *SNAP* the Lord cracked the whip and drove the sinners out (John 2:15).
Being patient, however, is a different feeling entirely. Being patient is not about holding back anger for as long as possible; it’s about waiting with trust and confidence that the one who made you the promise will keep his or her word. “Patient” and “patience” is a word that comes from many sources in the original language. Sometimes the original word means “hopeful endurance,” sometimes it means “meek waiting.” They are all part of the same emotional family, though: They all imply the attitude of people who know something better is coming and, until then, they can wait, even if they must suffer in the meantime.
My prayer for all of us is that we are a people long-suffering to one another and patient to the Lord as we await His coming.
~ Matthew